Running For My Life

Tomorrow I'm going to do a half marathon.  I've done seven in the last 4 years, but I've been off my training schedule for the past couple of months. 

I am still walking or walk/running 30-40 miles a week, so the new "lax" me is in a much better place physically 

than the girl who ran that first half four years ago.

Tomorrow is important. 

November is a heavy month for me emotionally. I've had three very close loved ones die in November. Some major life changing events happened to me in November. I've come to dread it. 

I have depression, and although I am medicated and counseled, there are times I need to do more. I knew I needed to turn November around. 

The simple, yet sometimes profound, daily affirmations of thankfulness are the first thing I did at the beginning of this month. It helps. 

I am also trying to be more mindful. For example, tonight as I observed a very miserable woman out to dinner with her spouse, I purposed to be more aware of my attitude. And how I am reflecting myself, and affecting others. 

Those are good things, but tomorrow's date is a significant day in my history. A day that, in the past, has made me morose, depressed, overly consumed. Etc. 

So tomorrow I am going to run. For my life. 

The last time I did this was after my miscarriage. I was in such a fragile state emotionally, and I needed to do something life affirming. I needed to push through the pain. So I ran, and so did the tears. 

So it will be tomorrow. 

I have a new playlist of music to keep me moving and positive. I go into this knowing full well I'm not going to have a peak performance- but that's okay. 

Tomorrow I am running for my life. 

I will be the better for it. 

e b e r